I watched the Biblegate!!!™ hearing so you don't have to

(You're welcome)

This year, Secular AZ has put more focus on local school boards than the Arizona State Legislature. We still track legislation, work behind the scenes with various other advocacy groups, and reach out to policymakers during the legislative session, but since we know that Governor Hobbs’ veto stamp awaits (most) religiously motivated bills, we’ve trained our sights on the approximately 300 school districts in the state. 

But when a sitting state representative gets ensnared in a controversy involving hidden bibles in a state building, well…we’ve GOTTA get involved with that! So buckle up, Secular Fam, because it’s time to talk…

BIBLEGATE!!!

For those of you who haven’t been paying attention, a few months ago, Representative Stephanie Stahl-Hamilton (D - Tucson) was found to be hiding bibles that were kept in the members lounge in the House of Representatives. Rep Stahl-Hamilton is an ordained Presbyterian minister, staunch supporter of the separation of church and state, and self-proclaimed basketball badass. 

You really can’t help but like her, but I digress. 

Recently, the House Ethics Committee voted unanimously that Rep Stahl-Hamilton should face consequences for hiding bibles under couch cushions and in a refrigerator (because this is apparently a more pressing issue than the housing shortage, drought, the economy, reproductive rights {or lack thereof}, etc.), so on Tuesday, June 13th, the entire House of Representatives got to weigh in.

I know you’re all going to be shocked, but there was a WHOLE bunch of evangelical hypocrisy and just general Christo-fascist ignorance happening on the floor, so get ready!

Rep Martinez (R - LD16) read the ethics committee findings with all the “whereases” and “therefores” and they cited Article IV, Part II, Section XI, and so on and so forth… 

Rep Grantham (R - LD14) put forward a substitute motion calling for expulsion based on the same citation. A motion to expel needs a ⅔ vote to pass, so this was wholly (not holy - HA!) performative, but many majority members LOVE them some performative political theater, so this tracks. 

So at this point, we’re here for real, to vote on censuring. You may remember that last session, the Senate voted to censure Wendy Rogers for making anti-semitic comments. However, this was really just more political theater, as she wasn’t stripped of her committee assignments, and she could still vote in committee and on the Senate floor. 

I wonder if the rules will be the same when a Democrat is the one being censured? Guess we’ll find out. 

Ahem…remember, there was a motion to censure and another to expel. Both members ended up requesting a roll call vote. 

At this point, Rep Salman (D - LD9) called for a substitute motion to recess, and division is called…

Motion to recess doesn’t pass. 

So let’s remember where we are. There are two motions. One to censure, and one to expel. 

First up, QAnon conspiracy theorist, Rep Kolodin (R - LD3) wants everyone to know that he’s spent his career fighting to restore the integrity of our elections. He’s suffered threats, he’s a martyr, bluster, bluster, bluster, commends the ethics committee. He said, certainly, rules were broken, but unlike Harris, Rep Stahl-Hamilton, he asserted, hads VERY CLEARLY committed her offense.

Kolodin asserted that in a just world, there would be equal justice, and Stahl-Hamilton would be expelled, but (harkening back to the expulsion of Harris) even if expelled member Harris had been a liberal Democrat, his vote would have been the same. So in spite of himself (his words), he voted no on Stahl-Hamilton’s expulsion. 

Rep Cook (R - LD7) shared that he felt privileged to work with Stahl Hamilton for years. According to him, she went on visits with him after wildfires and floods, listening to rural Arizonans to find solutions. When there was a vacancy, the Pinal Board of Supervisors chose Stahl-Hamilton.

In a nutshell, he asked: Haven’t we all made a bad decision at one time or another? He voted no.

Rep Heap (R - LD10) added his steam to the GQP pile-on of an ordained Christian minister, saying something about how it’s not easy to vote someone out, but sometimes it’s gotta be done. He equated her actions to (former Rep Liz) Harris’s behavior, but adds that it’s not just removing the bibles, it’s shoving them under cushions where people sit without their knowledge.

What do we value more? Reputation of elected reps or reputation of “god and the world?” He votes aye. 

Rep Smith (R - LD29) lamented that millions of Christians throughout the world have to hide their bibles so they’re not murdered. He then had an angry because during a global pandemic, the gubmint forced him and his family to have Christmas service outside his church in the parking lot. He thought that was DISGUSTING!

He asked if we’re going to tolerate this?? (Answering self) “NO!!!!” His job in the legislature is to stand up for religious freedom for all religions and their right to bring their religion into the peoples’ house. He votes aye.

Rep Diaz (R - LD19) said he took an oath to the constitution. BUT! He also took an oath to the church and the ministry to proclaim the gospel and to stand on its principles. He asserted that if we remove the bible from the foundation as the creation of our Constitution, the Constitution loses all of its meaning and its authority.

Diaz went on to say that It’s based on the foundation of the truths & principles of the scripture, and that the federalist papers act as a character guide of those who should represent our society.

Under his eye (see what I did there?), for us to understand that this country is blessed, we need to understand this foundation of the principle of the bible. He votes yes based on that (COMPLETELY FALSE) reason.

Rep Martinez (R - LD16) gets up to speak, and says something about how everyone like, totes knows how popular she is, and how much she just loves all people on both sides yadda, yadda, yadda. Some of her BFFs are democrats, and she’s the GQPs “crazy tia,” guyz. 

Well, she got one thing right in all that. 

She said they all (Rs & Ds) meet in the middle, and hug each other, go dancing together, etc., and it just sounds like a totally different vibe than the one I usually experience when I go down to the Capitol. This doesn’t feel honest, “tía loca.” ¡Siéntate!

But she continued, saying that Stahl-Hamilton’s protest is all wrong, and we can’t tolerate how Stahl-Hamilton, (an actual)  Christian, practices her faith in this way that Martinez disagrees with (or something like that). She’s hard to listen to, so I kinda drifted off. 

Rep Chaplik (R - LD3) chimed in to say that being ethics chairman means he has a responsibility. It’s a super hard job, guyz! He voted yes, but listening to him talk is like playing white noise in the background, so I kind of drifted off. Again! 

(Go easy on me. I do this so you don’t have to.)

Rep L. Hernandez (D - LD24) was up next and said she needed to give her opinion because she wanted folks to know her vote will not be a reflection of her faith, and that it’s undeniable that religion can be used as a weapon. I’m pretty sure she needed to say this because of her yes vote on the fetal torture bill, SB1600. I’m hopeful that Rep L. Hernandez has a better understanding of how religion has zero place in our government. She votes no to expel. 

Motion to expel fails, and now we’re back to the censure motion. 

Rep Quantá (pronounced Quan-TAY) Crews (D - LD26) is a newcomer, recently appointed to fill a vacancy in LD26. Also a minister, she read scripture and said that the bible directs us to forgive. She voted no. 

Rep Kolodin (R - LD3) says that if any employee of his had SO disrespected a colleagues’ religion he would instantly fire them. Censure is how we should handle ALL members’ first offense (once again, referencing the Harris expulsion vote). He goes on and on because he really likes to hear his own voice, but it’s just a lot, and I’m tired, but yeah, he votes yes.

Rep Gutierrez (D - LD18) She is an incredible freshman rep, and she basically says that Rep Stahl-Hamilton is DOPE! Votes no.

Rep Peshlakai (D - LD6) opened by speaking in her native tongue, and she talked about being forced into a different religious order in 1958 when she was forced into Bureau of Indian Affairs (BIA) schools, and she appreciates the teachings of the bible.

She has read it in English and Navajo, and that the biggest takeaway for her is forgiveness, and that it’s not really our place to judge. We need to live the “beauty way” of life. It was really lovely; her thoughtful way of speaking is soothing and you should check it out at about 46:30. 

Rep Jones (R - LD17) let everyone know that she thought it was disturbing & offensive to think of herself (GASP!) sitting on a bible, and that she’d feel the same no matter what text was hidden.

Mmmmkaaaayyyy - I’m sure she’s put Qurans, Talmuds, The Satanic Template’s Seven Tenets, and more in the members’ lounge. She votes ‘yes’ to censure. 

Rep B. Parker (R - LD10)  says that one of the reasons she’s there is to protect the constitution and freedom of religion. She wrongfully states that there is no separation of church and state, and she can say whatever the heck whenever the heck she wants, yadda, yadda, yadda.

She says it [religion] encompasses EVERYTHING WE ARE. Now folks, I hear a lot of grating voices in my travels to school board meetings and legislative hearings, but hers really takes the cake, and I just can’t y’all. She votes aye. 

Moving on…

Rep Salman (D - LD9) wants to address some comments that have been made. She asks everyone to remember, y’all, Stahl-Hamilton is an actual christian. She says that just because you think the Establishment Clause isn’t real doesn’t make that real. Real question is how we got here. Why was there a camera? Why was this whole thing orchestrated? Why is she being targeted? 

GOOD QUESTION. 

POINT OF ORDER - Montenegro, Rule 19, cannot attribute motives, something something…

Meanwhile, in Rep Salman’s mic, you can hear her ask why she can’t talk about the footage when everyone else gets to talk about their religion. 

THESE ARE ALL VERY GOOD QUESTIONS.

Rep Salman continues to ask why a spy camera was installed to watch all members? What else is on that footage? Why were those questions shut down in committee when Stahl-Hamilton’s counsel asked? She points out that members of the ethics committee tweeted before the hearing even started about what should happen to Stahl-Hamilton. Salman votes no. 

Rep Heap (R - LD10) claims that Salman is being disrespectful and denigrating. He also gives me closeted bear vibes, and I would love to see him one day out and proud. 

Rep Salman invokes rule 19 again…more back and forth…I’m really getting tired now…

Rep Marshall (R - LD7) brings up old tweets from Rep Stahl-Hamilton, and Rep Salman says tweets are irrelevant, and calls point of order, says they’re not germain. Old tweets aren’t in question, the bible prank is. 

Rep Marshall (R - LD7) continues to bring up old tweets from Stahl-Hamilton, specifically one where she says something like, “I’m running because I see too many bibles at the capitol.” He goes on to say that Stahl-Hamilton “claims to be an ordained minister” and “if she cares so much about separation of church and state, then why does she quote scripture when defending illegal immigration?” and then essentially questions if she’s a real Christian. He votes yes.

Rep Sandoval (R - LD23) Quotes scripture to justify her no vote. This is all so very meta.

Rep Cook (R - LD7) says “I get my religion [when] I speak to people in my hometown, in my church, my priest, and I don’t come here for it (religion).” He spoke w/ his friend, Rep Hamilton, and learned why she did what she did. He says this isn’t “how he’s been told that this would play out” and that he doesn’t like public shaming, Not in schools, not in churches, and definitely not at the legislature.

He wants good legislators behind him when he leaves, and that he’s more worried about that today. He went on to insinuate that many of these whippersnapper extremists will lose their seats if they keep on this path. Whoa. 

Cook was the lone R to vote against censuring, but the motion passed 30-28-2, with Rep A. Hernandez and Rep Travers not voting. 

So there you have it. This was just one day in the 2023 legislative session. This circus was your tax dollars at work. Nothing about the increasing costs of housing, healthcare, groceries, or gas…

… nope, they’re focused on bibles. Bibles in a government building where spy cameras were secretly installed, and we STILL DON’T KNOW what else is on that footage. 

These evangelical extremists maintain control of both chambers by one seat. They refuse to approve many of Governor Hobbs’ director appointments. They hold QAnon “COVID hearings,” and refuse to give most bills sponsored by Democrats a hearing, much less a floor vote. 

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